Formerly 'Rambling with a cantankerous old mule"
Shortly after waking up this morning I navigated over to Facebook, as is my wont most mornings. The first update that caught my eye was a friend’s Valentine’s Day status. I almost threw up – the saccharine sweetness overwhelming my inner cynic. Then there was another. And another. The nausea grew. I shut down the computer and went for a black coffee.
It turns out it wasn’t only the status updates that caused my queasiness though, as I’ve been in bed with a stomach bug to keep me company since mid morning. “One of my best Valentine’s Days ever,” I though to myself as I drifted back to consciousness later in the day …
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not anti-love or romance – I’m famous for my mixed tapes and de-thorning two hundred long-stemmed roses for the love of my life. (I think it was only 40 but time plays tricks on one’s memory. It could have been 100, but 200 sounds so much more romantic, or deranged!)
In fact, speaking of time messing with the memory – I was sure there were many more romantic moments, meals, gifts and surprises given for Valentine’s Day, but I just couldn’t remember any of them – having been single for so many years now. And so I contacted “Storm Rivers”, one of my ex-girlfriends, to ask if she could help me refresh my memory. She couldn’t.
“You did the most romantic stuff. I just don’t remember anything special. Sorry.”
Ha ha ha ha ha! (Yes, I laughed loudly and long, waking up my sickly dad a few rooms down.) Valentine’s Day is not a helpful holiday for many single people. I’ve seen plain-depressing things posted by singles today too, amongst the soppy stuff. But I prefer to laugh.
And hey, this top image may be politically incorrect, but it is funny!
See my other Valentine’s Day post My girlfriend isn’t real and, um, may be dead about how kids see the day.